One week down- One more to go!!

Yesterday marked our first week without Spencer. I survived- my first earthquake, hurricane (if you'd call it that) and all! And it was actually a lot easier than I thought it would be. Just knowing that Spencer wouldn't be coming home, and that I was the only one in charge, made me get in and get things done. I was super strict about bedtime- not a night later than 7 pm. That was the key to my sanity! I love my alone time and needed every minute I got of it. I did miss my Spencer time though- it's the time I look forward to every night- once the kids are in bed and we can just talk (without being interrupted every 5 seconds). The three hour time difference is a killer though, cause by the time Spencer was up and going in the morning (7am- 10am our time) we were usually heading off on our first outing of the day. Then by the time he left work it was almost 9:30pm our time- the kids were long asleep, and I was usually on my way.

But hands down, the hardest thing for me has been to hear Elle cry for her dad. He's the first person she asks for every morning and the last person she cries for at night. It breaks my heart. I think she's finally understanding that he isn't just living at work. At first she'd tell me, "Daddy's at work." or "Daddy's in a meeting."

Then it became more of a demand to see Spencer, "I wanna see my daddy. Where's my daddy?" "I miss my daddy."

And now that she's finally got the idea that Spencer's working in California it's, "I miss my daddy. I miss him so much. I wanna go pick him up right now!"

Luckily we've been able to skype several times and talk on the phone a couple times every day. But we're definitely excited about seeing Spencer this coming Saturday- and being able to play for an entire week together!

As for Spencer- he started at his new firm on Wednesday and is loving it already. On his first day, he was given a pile nearly two feet tall of cases, statutes, and articles to read to get him up to speed. He's been making steady progress. One of the things that attracted him to this firm was the opportunity to do significantly more trial work. Well, he got his wish...he has his first court call this Tuesday. And they trust him enough to argue the hearing on his own!! He's a little nervous but very excited for these kind of opportunities! A major perk is how close we will live to the office. From Camarillo, he can make it into the office in about 11 minutes. No more hour long commutes every morning and evening! His office is pretty nice, too. He's on the 14th floor and has an unobstructed view of the ocean and Anacapa and Santa Cruz islands! So whenever I want to go to the beach, I can give Spencer a call and ask him for a report on beach conditions.

Sharing

Not only do my girls share all their toys (well, usually), but at 2 years apart Madi and Elle are already sharing clothes and shoes! In the picture above, Madi's wearing a shirt that Elle just wore last week, Elle's wearing a dress that Madi wore a couple days ago, and Madi's got on Elle's flip flops (a little small- but Madi thinks they're "so cute" that she makes her foot fit)!

Our New Ride

Spencer took off for California yesterday morning. Surprisingly the girls remained composed and handled the goodbye really well. It was me who was the big cry baby and had to be comforted by my 2 and 4 year old daughters (I love how Elle knew exactly how to make it better- a back scratch, hugs, and kisses). Moving is very emotional for me. It's a lot of work, a lot of stress, and a lot of craziness. Spending the week packing Spencer up, cleaning out his side of the closet, donating his fish (I wasn't about to be put in charge of his fish tank after his departure), buying packing supplies (Spencer wanted to make sure I was set for what lies ahead- ug), etc was super draining. But truthfully the hardest part about saying goodbye was realizing that Spencer will never be back to this house again. Watching him drive away made me feel very very alone. If my parents weren't coming out I'd be totally freaking out (ok, I never would have agreed to staying behind if they weren't coming out). But I do know I can handle it. Spencer already has a flight booked for Sept. 3rd- the day we head to the Outer Banks for a solid week of playing together at the beach. I can hardly wait- only 13 days away!!

And since Spencer is driving out my (now his) Altima to CA, we knew I'd be needing a new car- or rather a VAN!! Yep, we did it- we bought a van! And I LOVE it. . . every bit of it! And the girls have been just as excited about it! They beg to go for rides, they love the automatic doors, they love being able to get in and out by themselves, and the best part- there's not been any fighting in the car since we got it a week ago! It really is incredible! I am one happy mama!

Uncle Clark

Last Sunday my brother flew in for a quick visit. Due to delayed- then canceled flights, Clark's supposed weekend trip was turned into a short overnight stay. But regardless of the length of his visit, we were just thrilled to have Clark here! We talked long into the night and then were awakened in the early morning by overly excited little girls wanting to play with their uncle. Thanks Clark for rearranging your plans to make sure we fit into them. We love you!!

BIG changes

Last week my registration tags for the Altima arrived in the mail- from CA. Yes, my car still has California plates and I still even have a California license (and a California phone number for that matter). I've thought about it several times, wondering when I'd be able to fully commit and become a full fledge east coaster. I guess it was the never feeling totally settled- we never knew what would be in store for us after law school and then when we moved back we weren't sure if we'd be moving to Virginia or staying in Maryland, etc. I guess it's for this reason that I've kept all my California identification. And now I am grateful for it, because.... we're moving back to California!!!

And let me just say what a complete stress these past couple of weeks (or should I say months) have been. Let me rewind a bit. Back in April Spencer interviewed with a Law Firm out in CA- Ventura County to be exact. We were stoked about the possibility of living our dream (we always figured we'd never be able to move to Ventura County until we were retired). Then several weeks later Spencer received a letter from the firm stating that they decided against hiring anyone for the time being. Oh well... Things were going wonderfully and we'd pretty much closed that CA door completely, until mid July when Spencer heard from one of the head partners of the CA firm again. They called Spencer up to tell him that they were planning on hiring another associate, asking if he was still interested. The partner mentioned wanting someone out there quickly so we figured we would hear back soon. Days turned to weeks and still nothing. We assumed that they must have already filled the position and a letter would be coming shortly. So, when a member of the Stake Presidency called Spencer into his office that Sunday morning and extended the call of 1st counselor in the bishopric, we figured that was our answer- Spencer must be needed here. We felt good about it, until 2 days later when Spencer received an email from the CA firm, thanking him for his patience, informing him that they were concluding interviews that week, and that Spencer was at the top of their list and they'd be contacting him within the week! That's when things started to get a little interesting. We still weren't sure what they'd offer or if it was right for us. Sunday came, Spencer was called, sustained, ordained, and set apart as the 1st counselor. Then the next day he gets a call from the CA firm with an offer! Talk about not knowing what to do! Spencer spent the next week exploring all possible opportunities for growth and upward movement with his firm here, but things were looking really sketchy (his firm, and D.C. law firms in general, are not doing so hot in this economy!). He was basically told that salary increases at his current firm were off the table and that they could not match the offer. On top of this, the firm recently announced that it was moving offices to cut back on costs and several partners had recently jumped ship ... Needless to say, Spencer was not very confident in his job security. We spent the week in prayer, fasting, thought, weighing pros, and cons, and evenings in the temple. Then near the end of the week everything became very clear and Spencer knew what he was supposed to do and he accepted the associate position at the CA law firm! We are so excited and know this is the right move for our family, but it completely killed Spencer to have to tell our bishop the news.

Things are actually moving really quickly. Spencer heads out this coming Saturday (ya, I'm kinda freaking out- that's less than 5 days away!!!), but since we are signed into a lease here at our townhouse through November, the girls and I are going to stay behind to try and get it rented out. My parents already had a trip planned to come out here the end of September/beginning of October, so my plan is to stick it out until then, have my mom help me finish packing (she's moved us 2 other times now, so it should be a piece of cake :), and then she'll road trip it out west with the girls and I. I'm not sure if I can be separated from Spencer for that long. Luckily, we'd already planned a beach trip to the Outer Banks the week of Labor Day, so he'll definitely be flying back for that. I'm just hoping it will give me the strength to get through the reminder of September.

As excited as I am about moving to Camarillo (where I've wanted to live since the first time I came to visit), there are so so many things I'm gonna miss about living here. I'm super sad about leaving all our dear friends behind (just hoping they'll all come out to visit). I'm gonna miss the changing of the seasons- I'm heartbroken that I won't be here long enough to see all of fall. And I'm crushed about missing out on our ward's primary program (I'll be leaving 3 weeks before the actual program)! The kids have worked so hard learning all those songs- I'm devastated about not being able to hear their final performance.

But luckily there are many pluses that come with with our decision to move- like:

1) Being MUCH closer to family (minutes from Spencer's parents and a 5 or 6 hour drive from my parents)

2) Better job + more $ + happier husband = happier wife!

3) Our many good friends that live there

4) A 15 minute drive to the beach

5) An hour and 45 minute drive to Disneyland- Madi's been begging to go and we were trying to figure out how to make Disneyworld a family vacation, but now this will be so much easier!

6) The weather. I'll definitely miss the changing of the seasons, but come January, I'm always more than happy to give up the cold and snow.

7) All the other things we love about California- sailing out to the Islands, backyard BBQ's year round, running outside year round, weekly beach outings, palm trees, etc.

Enjoying it

We've had a lot going on over here at the Jenkins' house (more posts coming soon), but today I realized that it's been almost 2 weeks since I picked up my camera. I've been feeling like a bad mom lately- feeling like I don't enjoy my kids like I should. I feel like I'm constantly breaking up fights and dealing with screaming and arguing. But today was nice. Today I took my girls to their very first Mommy & Me activity of the year. I used to go all the time with Madi, but then the outings just became more work than fun. And I got tired of the same activities, the long lines, the large groups of kids, etc, etc. But today was fabulous- the weather was incredible (high 70's), it wasn't very crowded, and we only had to wait in line once (and not for very long). The girls loved it all! They got balloons, played with bubbles, did lots of coloring (one of Madi's all time favorite things to do), made necklaces and bracelets, did sticker art, painted with marbles, and got to see a bunch of their friends- all in just 2 hours!! I had to laugh after I packed all our stuff into the car to head home. I looked back at Madi and Elle and it seriously looked like a circus back there with all their balloons, necklaces, and projects. I so needed this time spent with my girls today. My goal is to come up with something fun and different (other than our regular outings- the park, pool, library, and store) every week that I take my girls to and just enjoy being with them.